Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Randomize