woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
