i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
