so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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