U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
