cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
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