soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I believe in your delicious
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize