every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Randomize
