Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Randomize
