do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Everclear isn't food dammit
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
