If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
