you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
