Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
