420 ftw
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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