whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
