I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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