I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
Randomize
