Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
