What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
