i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
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