Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
