Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
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