You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
He called his prostate his "boner button".
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
