Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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