I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
