what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Randomize
