You work out of a Hotel?
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
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