You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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