Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
