sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
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