I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Randomize
