when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Randomize
