So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
