Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
The Olympian is in my bed
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize