weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize