We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize