Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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