is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
