As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
