Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
another moral hangover. fuck.
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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