Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I seem to have left my pride at pride
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
