u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
