I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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