I want to stick my p in your. b.
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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