I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
