Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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