You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
