hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Randomize