Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
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