you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize